Change
THE QUICK MISS
I’m almost a golfer. I love the game, always feel like I’m about to break thru to the next level and usually don’t. There are a couple of reasons my scores don’t improve and they’re mostly related to the amount of time I practice. Because I don’t. Schedules, travel, whatever the excuse is I just don’t spend much time on the range. But, I play when I can, take lessons and while my friends are hitting the ball 50… Read More
“AS IF”
I’m not in recovery but I have been in therapy for many decades: And I can’t see leaving anytime soon. Just when I think I am free to go my therapist says something that is so revelatory I realize I could be a lifer. Last week I was talking about various people in my life and sharing some events, nothing earth shattering, it all veered more into the realm of annoying and he said “You are treating all these… Read More
CHRISTMAS IN JULY
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened. —Dr. Seuss I stand forty-eight inches tall, am black (African-American), Christian, and gay. These are not labels, but incontrovertible truths. I know both the joy of favor; and the pain of prejudice. Life has taught a bit about the freedom that blooms from seeds of gratitude watered with faith; and the fruit of abundance that accompanies trust. but more often than I care to admit, I find myself in life’s remedial… Read More
ARE YOU A YES-AHOLIC? TRY THIS 12-STEP CURE
Every time you say yes, you give away a piece of yourself. It’s a commitment of time, energy, brainpower and bandwidth. If you are operating at full capacity, there is little margin for error. When you experience a spike in demand, something must inevitably drop off the list. For someone who is a YES-aholic, prone to taking on new commitments, the aspect of reneging can be particularly painful. Instead of one big up-front no, there can be a recurring chain of NO, SORRY,… Read More
DOUBLE, DOUBLE OTHER PEOPLES’ TROUBLES
….can enter your life and make it bubble…… Who amongst us has not experienced this? Here we are tra-la-la bumbling along dealing with our shit, facing our issues, trying to sort through the daily pimples on the skin of our lives and pop them before they fester. We’re working with our loved ones, workmates, roommates, randomly frazzled friends and sometimes strained relations in as mature and self-aware manner as we can. We’re attempting and more often than not succeeding… Read More
WHERE ARE YOU UNHAPPY?
When we go to the doctor they always ask “Where does it hurt?” But unless you go to a psychologist or therapist of some sort, people don’t tend to ask you “where are you unhappy?” I don’t mean this in terms of a place. Like I hate the beach. Or I get depressed in dark museums. I’m miserable at my in-laws. It’s the question we need to constantly ask ourselves about our lives. Where are we unhappy? Is it with… Read More
PLAY YOUR GAME BETTER
Do you find it interesting how so often when you least expect to hear something inspirational it comes to you from the least likely of places? And more often than not it zips in at exactly the right time. You gotta love the universe. And when did I start sounding like Paul? Yesterday after a long day of work I threw my tired body into a taxi. All I wanted was a little quiet until I got home and… Read More
CHANGING LIFE LANES
I know today is affirmation day, but we are kind of getting our blogging legs here and sometimes there will be things that we post just because they are so awesome or relevant or uplifting they need to be shared right away. I just watched a really important video of a lecture given by the philosopher Roman Krznaric. “Roman Krznaric is a cultural thinker and writer on the art of living. He is a founding faculty member of The School of Life in… Read More