Gratitude and Trust: Six Affirmations That Will Change Your Life

Addictions

NO ONE LIKES THE CENTER

I was not going to use yesterday’s affirmation for my blog today, but in keeping with the pattern of my morning I can’t locate the Joseph Campbell quote we were going to post. And I happen to be on an airplane that has no Wi-Fi.

Though the sentiment works perfectly for me today.

The truth is we can all be selfish jackasses.  The secret is taking responsibility, owning it and righting it immediately if not sooner.

I wish there was a smart phone App that rang a bell when we start going to a place we don’t like, the way it does to alert us to an upcoming appointment.

Paul and I have a series of six affirmations in our book. The only one we publically voice is “Something Needs To Change and it’s Probably Me.”

The impulse to start blaming others or taking your frustration out on them when things aren’t going your way is a common response.

I spent an hour this morning being a selfish jackass, but the good news is thanks to our affirmations I do have a version of that App in place, partially in place. And I have learned to correct myself pretty quickly.

I am an extremely organized person Especially when it comes to things like getting to airports on time, booking seats and reserving things in advance

This week I’m taking my 13 year old on something I’m calling the Grandparent Express, we are spending five days with my mother in California and four days with my husband’s parents in Florida.

I travel a fair amount. I don’t like middle seats. I actually think there are two kinds of people in the world, windows and aisles. Nobody wants to sit in the center. I also like extra legroom. I know every seat on Jet Blue with legroom. My favorite seat is 10 D.  I normally book it myself. I let someone else do it this time.

So as usual we got to the airport two hours early.  The security line looked like people were waiting to get on Space Mountain in the middle of July.  I told Lucy it was OK, we would be late but get through and  because we had legroom seats we boarded first. At which point I looked at my ticket and saw we were sitting two aisles away from each other, in the back of the plane in center seats.  Enter selfish jackass.  I did in defense spend a second looking for the gratitude in the moment. But all I could see was me cramped in a center seat, no legroom, trying to work for six hours. As I was calling the person who booked it to let them know how displeased I was, I got an email that something on our website that should have been taken care of last week, had not.   My frustration level was mounting.

I was moving into total jackass. So she made a mistake and forgot to book me seats, we all make mistakes. Six hours is not an eternity.  I was setting a bad example for my daughter. I understood my behavior but at that moment was unwilling to control it.  So I decided to start sending aggressive texts to Paul who I blamed for the website guffaw. I had to blame someone!  Paul, who was just jogging around his bay, taking photos being all trusty and grateful.

By the time we finally got to security the woman in front of us started to play with her fanny pack. The conveyer belt was empty and moving and she chose this moment to reorganize herself. So, I snapped, “Can you maybe speed it up a little.” She looked like a librarian or someone used to dealing with petulant children.  With a twinge of scold in her voice she said, ‘If you’re in such a hurry you go ahead.”

It was at that moment it hit me, wooooh, girlfriend get a grip. These are your issues.  Stop being frustrated with everyone you come in contact with. I told her “No thank you, It’s fine.”

She insisted.  At which point I started apologizing.  I said sorry as I took my shoes off, while I put my computer in the bin, and as I took my liquids out. Then despite the fact the line had made us late, I stopped, looked her in the eye and said, “My behavior to you was totally unacceptable, I am having a bad morning.  It is not your fault and I should not have asked you to hurry. I hope you have a good flight.”

I then got through security called Paul and apologized.

The point is – we all get frustrated. Days, situations, plans run amok and all people are fallible.

So when life’s hiccups lead your behavior to impatient, self-destructive or unkind, stop yourself as quickly as you can. Listen to how you are sounding and behaving.

At the moment there may be things going on that aren’t on your agenda, need to be fixed or issues that require sorting out; things most likely  need to change but the first one is probably your response.